Navigating Childhood Nightmares: A Guide for Parents

Understand the causes of nightmares in children and explore calm, supportive approaches to help your child feel safe and return to sleep.

1. Understanding the Experience. Nightmares usually occur during REM sleep, the stage where most dreaming happens. Unlike night terrors, which leave a child confused or inconsolable and often unaware of their surroundings, a child waking from a nightmare is typically alert and able to describe—at least in part—what they saw. They are seeking comfort and the reassurance that they are safe in their own home. Many parents find that acknowledging the child's fear without validating the reality of the "monster" or "scary thing" is a helpful balance. By saying, 'I know that felt very scary, but you are safe here in your bed,' you provide comfort while keeping the focus on their physical security.
2. Approaches to Comfort and Reassurance. When a child wakes up frightened, many families choose to offer immediate, calm physical presence. Sitting with the child in their room until they feel settled can reinforce that their sleep space remains a safe environment. Some parents prefer to keep the lights low and interactions quiet to avoid over-stimulating the child, which can make it harder for them to drift back to sleep. Another common approach involves talking through the dream during daylight hours, rather than in the middle of the night. This allows the child to process the imagery when they are fully rested and less vulnerable. Some children find empowerment in changing the ending of the dream, drawing a picture of the scary character looking silly, or using a 'monster spray' to help them feel in control of their environment.