Understanding the Division of Responsibility in Feeding

An overview of the Division of Responsibility model, a framework that separates the roles of parents and children during mealtimes to reduce pressure.

1. The Parent's Role. In the sDOR model, the parent is responsible for the 'what,' 'when,' and 'where' of feeding. This means deciding what food is served, setting a predictable schedule for meals and snacks, and ensuring the eating environment is calm and free from distraction. Parents who adopt this approach find that by focusing on providing nutritious options at set times, they can step back from managing the child's intake. Crucially, this role does not include pressuring a child to eat, coaxing them to try new foods, or limiting their intake. The goal is to provide the structure so the child knows when they will next have an opportunity to eat, which can alleviate anxiety for both parties.
2. The Child's Role. The child is responsible for the 'how much' and 'whether' of eating. This honors the child's internal cues of hunger and satiety. When a child is trusted to decide whether to eat and how much to consume from the options provided, research suggests they are more likely to develop a healthy, intuitive relationship with food over time. Some families find this shift challenging, as it requires trusting that a child will not go hungry if they choose not to eat a particular meal. However, practitioners of this model emphasize that as long as the parent consistently provides the 'when' and 'where,' the child remains well-supported in their nutritional needs.