How to Help Your Child Develop a Growth Mindset About School

Learn practical ways to help your child embrace challenges, learn from mistakes, and develop resilience in their school journey.

1. Focus on Effort Over Results. Instead of saying 'You're so smart!' when your child gets a good grade, try 'I can see how hard you worked on that math homework.' This teaches them that success comes from effort, not just natural talent. When they struggle with something, acknowledge their persistence: 'You kept trying even when it was difficult.' Avoid labeling children as 'the math kid' or 'not a reader' - these fixed labels can limit how they see their potential.
2. Reframe Mistakes as Learning Opportunities. When your child makes mistakes on homework or gets a poor test grade, resist the urge to fix everything immediately. Instead, sit with them and ask 'What can we learn from this?' Help them identify specific areas to improve and make a plan together. Share your own mistakes and what you learned from them. Say things like 'Mistakes help our brains grow' or 'Every expert was once a beginner who made lots of mistakes.'
3. Teach the Power of 'Yet'. When your child says 'I can't do fractions' or 'I'm terrible at writing,' add the word 'yet' to the end. 'You can't do fractions yet' or 'You haven't mastered writing yet.' This simple word shift opens up possibilities and reminds them that abilities can be developed. Encourage them to use 'yet' in their own self-talk when they face challenges.
4. Model Growth Mindset Yourself. Let your children see you learning new things and struggling with challenges. Talk out loud about your own learning process: 'This new software is confusing, but I'm going to watch some tutorials and practice.' When you make mistakes, show them how you handle it positively. Avoid saying things like 'I was never good at math' in front of them, as this can reinforce fixed mindset thinking.
5. Ask Better Questions. Instead of just asking 'How was school?' or 'What did you learn today?', try questions that promote growth thinking. Ask 'What was challenging today?' 'What mistake did you make that taught you something?' 'What did you improve at today?' or 'What do you want to get better at tomorrow?' These questions help them reflect on their learning process rather than just outcomes.
6. Create a Safe Space for Struggles. Make sure your child knows that your home is a safe place to admit when something is hard. Don't rush to solve their problems or get frustrated when they don't understand something quickly. Instead, sit with them in the difficulty and problem-solve together. Celebrate their willingness to tackle challenging tasks, even if they don't succeed right away.