How to Set Up a Nanny Share

A step-by-step guide to organizing a successful nanny share arrangement with another family.

1. Find the Right Family to Share With. Start by looking for families with similar values, schedules, and childcare philosophies. Ask friends, neighbors, or check local parent groups and apps like Care.com or Nextdoor. When you meet potential families, discuss your expectations about discipline, screen time, meals, and daily routines. Make sure your schedules align well - ideally, both families need care for similar hours and days. Consider the children's ages and personalities too. Kids who are close in age often work well together, but a mix of ages can also be enriching.
2. Decide on Location and Space Setup. Choose which home will host the nanny share, or alternate between both homes on different days. The hosting home needs enough space for all children to play safely, adequate supplies like high chairs or cribs for different ages, and childproofing for the youngest child in the group. Stock up on extra supplies like diapers, snacks, and toys. If alternating locations, create a system for transporting car seats, diaper bags, and other essentials between homes.
3. Find and Hire Your Shared Nanny. Both families should interview candidates together to ensure everyone feels comfortable. Look for nannies experienced with multiple children and age groups. Discuss the unique aspects of a nanny share during interviews, including managing different family rules and routines. Check references carefully and run background checks. Make sure your nanny is comfortable with the arrangement and has experience handling the dynamics of caring for children from different families.
4. Establish Clear Agreements and Contracts. Create a written agreement covering payment splits, schedules, sick day policies, and household rules. Decide how to split costs - typically 60/40 if one family has two children and the other has one, or 50/50 for equal numbers. Establish backup care plans for when one family doesn't need the nanny. Include termination clauses and how to handle conflicts. Consider having a family lawyer review your agreement. Also create individual employment contracts with your nanny that clearly outline expectations, duties, and compensation.
5. Handle Logistics and Communication. Set up a communication system between families and your nanny using apps like group texts or shared calendars. Create emergency contact lists for both families. Establish protocols for pick-ups, drop-offs, and schedule changes. Decide how to handle supplies, groceries, and activity costs. Plan regular check-ins between all parties to address any concerns or adjustments needed. Consider creating a shared notebook or app where your nanny can update both families about daily activities, meals, and any issues.
6. Navigate Tax and Legal Responsibilities. Understand that you're both household employers, which means handling payroll taxes, workers' compensation, and potentially unemployment insurance. Decide which family will be the primary employer for tax purposes, or if you'll split responsibilities. Consult with an accountant familiar with household employment or use a nanny payroll service. Make sure your homeowner's or renter's insurance covers having a nanny and additional children in your home. Keep detailed records of all payments and employment-related expenses.