How to Help Your Child Get Better at Strategy Games

Practical ways to build strategic thinking skills through board games, card games, and puzzles with your kids.

1. Start with games that match their developmental stage. The best strategy game for your child is one that's challenging enough to be interesting but not so complex that it becomes frustrating. For younger children (3-5), games like Candy Land or Chutes and Ladders introduce the concept of planning moves and following rules, even though luck plays a major role. As kids develop (6-8), games like Connect Four, Checkers, or Sequence for Kids add more strategic elements while remaining accessible. Older children (9+) can handle more complex games like chess, Settlers of Catan, or Ticket to Ride. The key is watching your child's response—if they're getting overwhelmed or losing interest quickly, the game might be too advanced. If they're winning easily without much thought, it might be time to level up.
2. Focus on thinking process, not winning. Many parents instinctively let their kids win to build confidence, but this approach can backfire with strategy games. Instead, focus on praising good thinking: "I noticed you looked at three different moves before choosing—that's great planning" or "You remembered what I did last time and planned for it." When your child makes a mistake, resist the urge to immediately point it out. Let them discover consequences naturally, then discuss what happened: "What do you think led to that outcome?" or "If you played that situation again, what might you try differently?" This builds genuine strategic thinking rather than dependence on your guidance.
3. Teach pattern recognition gradually. Strategy games are fundamentally about recognizing patterns and predicting outcomes. You can help your child develop this skill by thinking out loud during your turns: "I'm putting my piece here because I see you're building toward that corner" or "I'm choosing this card because it blocks three different ways you could win." Start with simple pattern recognition in games like tic-tac-toe ("Look for two in a row—yours to complete or mine to block") and gradually work up to more complex patterns in games like chess ("Knights move in an L-shape, so let's see where this one could go next turn"). The goal is to help them see the game as a series of connected moves rather than isolated decisions.
4. Use the "what if" technique. Before your child makes a move, occasionally ask "What do you think will happen if you do that?" or "What are two different moves you could make right now?" This slows down impulsive play and encourages forward thinking. For older kids, you can extend this to "What do you think I'll do in response to that move?" This introduces the concept of thinking multiple moves ahead—a key strategic skill. Don't overuse this technique (it can make games feel like school), but sprinkle it in when you notice they're rushing through turns without consideration.
5. Create a strategy-friendly environment. Some families find that strategy games work best when there's dedicated time and space—a weekly game night, a cleared dining room table, phones put away. Others prefer more casual integration, keeping a chess set or deck of cards accessible for spontaneous games. Consider your child's energy and attention patterns. Some kids think more clearly in the morning, others after school. Some need snacks and background music; others need quiet focus. The environment should support concentration without feeling overly serious or pressured.
6. Handle wins and losses gracefully. Strategy games inevitably involve losing, which can be particularly hard for kids who are used to succeeding. Model good sportsmanship yourself: congratulate them genuinely when they win, and when you win, acknowledge their good moves: "You had me worried when you captured my queen—that was a smart move." If your child struggles with losing, consider games where everyone can succeed to some degree (cooperative games like Pandemic Junior) or games with multiple ways to score points (like Splendor, where you can feel good about your gem collection even if you don't win). Gradually work back to head-to-head competition as their tolerance for losing develops.